In the land of The Boss, fist pumps and cheap gas (aka New Jersey), a husband and wife ignored the warnings given by parents before them. They thought, “no, no, not our precious little family members.” Who would have thought a dog, a bird and a toddler could cause so much havoc?
From the dark shadows of a hallway, the mini black-ops in training kept watch of that special little room of tile and multiple water sources. We call it a bathroom; the mini black-ops call it a splash park. The room often sat empty. But just as the husband or wife closed that old white, rickety door, the pet bird squawked, and the dog and toddler sprang into action.
The wife went to pee. BAM! “Hi” is enthusiastically screamed, followed by a wave and a curious stare from the big-eyed toddler.
The husband attempted to brush his teeth. BAM! sniff, sniff, sniff, and the little white furry dog falls asleep on his feet.
The wife hopped in the shower. BAM! A small head and arm appeared on a side of the shower curtain, “Book?” as Chicka Chicka Boom Boom gets drenched with water (good thing this household has multiple copies for emergencies like this one).
Words with Friends rounds unsolved.
Newspapers never read.
Legs not shaved.
The attacks continued for months.
The husband and wife almost lost hope.
That is until a game of Candy Crush was interrupted right as the last bit of jelly was about to be crushed.
It was a red phone moment.
But Carrie Mathison was too busy with a jazz freak-out to assist.
So the husband and wife banded together and put their clearly unhelpful in situations like this Bachelor of Arts degrees to use, and fixed the bathroom door.
With a sigh of relief, they can now return to the porcelain throne in peace … that is until the toddler is tall enough to reach the door knob.
Word Count: 327 (drafted for the Trifecta Writing Challenge)